This Year

I feel like everyone says it every single year, but seriously, I cannot believe another year is coming to an end. So much has happened this past year, it's hard to capture it all in one blog post. Hopefully I have been doing an okay job of that since I started this blog. My friend and fellow PCV, John, posted a blog listing a few of the things he had never done before coming to Suriname. I think it's a neat way to reflect on all of the new experiences that were brought to me this year as I prepare to bid adieu to 2011. I am stealing his idea, but you can click here to read his blog. Sorry if it is more interesting than mine.

While most of the things I have experienced since being here are new and different, these are a few that stick out in my mind.
Before I moved to Suriname, never had I ever...

• eaten a mango fresh off of the tree (or ground)
• bathed in a river or with cold water
• been to the jungle
• eaten a pig's tail or a piranha
• spoken anything besides English on a daily basis
• had such a great tan in December
• used a latrine
• held a baby sloth
• held so many babies
• washed clothes and dishes by hand
• lived without refrigeration and running water
• lived alone
• gone a week without washing my hair (Bonnaroo is 4 days, people)
• been to South America
• owned a machete and given it to children to use
• had to deal with bats and rats helping me inhabit my house
• seen a tarantula in person
• not freaked out when I saw any size or type of spider
• tied and slept in my own hammock. outside. in the jungle.

These are things that I did not resolve to do in 2011, but I am incredibly thankful that I have experienced them. Isn't that the way it usually is? I think so.

I think I have to give 2011 the credit for being one of the biggest and most defining years of my life. It has been huge. I was invited to serve as a Peace Corps Volunteer and I accepted. I spent so much wonderful time with the people I love in preparation for not being able to spend time with them for a little while. I said goodbye to my dear family and friends knowing I would not be able to hug them for a while. Without knowing it, I also said goodbye to Mexican food and the joy it brings to my life for equally as much time. (Honestly, this year could have turned out totally differently had I know there was none to be found in this country). Finally May arrived and, despite being terrified, I boarded a plane bound for Miami.

Almost eight months later I sit here reflecting on the experiences I have had and the people that have been a part of them, and despite not being filled with Mexican food, I am filled with gratitude for the life I lead and the folks in it who make is so much sweeter.

The coming of the New Year is always a little sad for me, and that's because the current year is always pretty rockin' for me. I'm sad to see 2011 go. It has been a tremendous year. Good luck, 2012.

As I look forward to the many adventures, challenges, and experiences 2012 is sure to bring, I want to wish all of you a very happy New Year. Thank you for supporting me and keeping up with my life in 2011.

"And surely you will buy your cup and surely I'll buy mine and we'll take a cup of kindness yet for auld lang syne."

I'll Be Home for Christmas If Only in My Dreams

Today is Christmas. It's my first Christmas away from my family. This Christmas I treated myself to a nice hotel room with a really comfy bed and a tv. Last night I took a hot shower for the first time since May 2. All I could do was smile, like an idiot, the entire time. Although I have to admit, like most experiences I've had in this country, it felt foreign. I am staying at this nice hotel with my friend and fellow PCV, Jamie. We had dinner by the pool last night and a delicious breakfast this morning. I have spent the majority of today in my room, watching tv and taking advantage of the hotel's internet. It has been super relaxing, and I will not judge myself if I cry when I have to check out tomorrow. 

Being away for the holidays has been an odd experience. However, I have not been as sad as I thought I might be. I know my family members are having a great holiday, and that makes me happy. I miss them and completely wish I could be there, and obviously they wish the same. 

Christmas love. 

I Skyped with the family this morning and we opened presents. Santa made it to Suriname and I am so very thankful he did. 

The Hawaii Bowl was on ESPN here today. Southern Miss to the top! 

This Christmas I traded peppermint mocha and time with my family for Peace Corps service and bug bites. I traded scarves and gloves for a really great tan, and traded turkey for pizza. I am where I should be this Christmas and, as always, I am overwhelmed with the love and support from those who mean most to me. 

And so, this Christmas I will remind myself (as I sweat and scratch bug bites) that I am here because I believe in a world governed by love and peace. I will remind myself that it is this way because the world was given a Savior, and that I am saved because of Him. On this night divine I will rejoice with the weary world and do so because of the love, joy, and peace, that lives within me because of the love that is so freely given to me. 

Happy Christmas! 

Polly Wants Nothing to do With Me

A few weeks ago I had a conversation with one of my neighbors and her bird. This woman's house is behind mine, and her bird wakes me up every single morning at about seven o'clock. Other than this bird, things are relatively quiet around my house. I had been sitting with her for a few minutes when she asked if I could write papers (like a passport) for her bird and take it to America. I did not want to be rude and ask if she was crazy, so I said, "Maybe." She then proceeded to tell me that the bird will talk to me and ask me questions and I need to answer him when he does. As I was looking in the tree above us for the bird, I asked her where the bird was. Her response was "Ma sabi sei. Kande hen go a pei ma hen o ko bakka." Translation" "I don't know. Maybe he went out, but he'll come back." I had to hold in my laughter for the duration of this conversation. 

A few days after our conversation I went back to try and talk to the bird. The lady was wrong. The bird did not ask me questions, so I tried talking to him. I wish I could say that the bird was simply ignoring me, but that's not true. As I stood under the tree talking to the bird, the bird climbed higher and higher up the branches. To which my neighbor said, "Oh he's scared of you because you're white." This cannot be real life. An animal is afraid of me because I am white. I've already had to deal with most children crying at the site of me, and now a bird? Geez. I would like to say that the babies and toddlers of Malobi are making great strides in accepting my white skin. I get more hugs than I do screams, and that is a huge improvement.

Now, if only this bird weren't hurting my ego. 

I literally had to sneak attack this bird for this picture. It kept running away from me. Not kidding. 

Giving Thanks

The day before Thanksgiving, I was able to video chat with a couple of dear friends in America. It was so good to laugh with them and catch up on each others lives. Needless to say their stories were more "normal" than mine, but I appreciate so much the fact that they still share their lives with me and are interested in what I am doing as well. I miss people, and I need to be kept up-to-date just as much as people want to know what is happening in my life. Friends, I love you.

As I was talking with Mallory, I got upset. Mallory is not shy with her emotions, and neither am I. We both cried as we talked about missing each other and wanting to see each other, but somewhat secretly I was crying for another reason. I was crying because I felt sorry for myself. Yes, it's true. I think we all have those moments from time to time, and as I was talking with my friend in America, I had trouble denying myself a little pity. Mallory lives in Seattle with her husband, Daniel. As she and I were talking she was busy cooking Thanksgiving dinner for friends that they would be entertaining the next day. She gave me a tour of their adorable warehouse apartment close to downtown Seattle. She showed off a new oversized chair she has purchased since I last talked to her, and talked about getting ready to decorate their Christmas tree soon. I could not help wanting to trade places with her. Her life seemed so adorable and perfect. As I thought about my house in the jungle and the creatures that help me inhabit it, I cried. I want to own a couch and sit on it. I want to have pretty candle holders and hang pictures on the wall and entertain my friends for brunch. I want to live in a city and have to actually wear real clothes to a job, and not just real clothes, but cute clothes. Really cute clothes with really cute boots. I want to meet my friends for dinner after work and I want to coordinate plans with them on an iPhone. Talking to Mallory, I was ill with want. I want a lot, I realize that. I also realize that I titled this post "Giving Thanks," and I have yet to do that. So, before I feel too sorry for myself and people stop reading this because I am being so ungrateful, let me explain. 

I do not always feel this way. Being away for the holidays is going to be more of a challenge than I thought. Not only that, but I am about to hit my seven month mark in my service. The new, shiny PCV feeling is wearing off, and I am settling into what is becoming the new norm. Sometimes I envy my friends in America. I envy the lives they are leading and the fact that they can spend their free time on a couch, watching t.v. if they so choose. However, before I get too carried away with envy, I am reminded that their lives are great, but great for them. At this time, I am not meant to be in City X, America wearing cute boots and going to dinners with friends coordinated on an iPhone. I am meant to be in Suriname as a Peace Corps volunteer. I firmly believe that it is ok for me to be honest about the way I am feeling about being away from the comforts I know in America. However, I can be honest without being negative. I must be honest without letting myself be negative, because at the end of each and every day, I live a life that is overflowing with privilege. I may not own a couch, but I do own a machete. I don't get to host brunch for friends, but I get to bake cakes for people in my village. I don't get to live in a city right now, but I get to live in the jungle. I get to live in the jungle so much that I get to be tired of living in the jungle. To say that I am a Peace Corps volunteer is a privilege. It's a privilege that I asked for, and I was privileged to accept when Peace Corps asked me to serve. 

When my sister and I were in high school, we started a silly ritual on Thanksgiving Day. Before we ask blessings on our food, and before anyone at the table can take a bite, everyone has to say what they are thankful for. Sometimes the things we say are silly and sometimes they are earnest and emotional. Since I could not be with my family this year, I have decided that I would share my list, not only with them, but with all of you. Some of the things on my list have always been there, but the fact that the angus burger combo from McDonald's is on there proves that there are lots of things on my list that I never intended to be truly thankful for. 

So, this year I am especially thankful for:

Internet. Skype. Facebook. International calling and cell phone reception in the jungle of Suriname. Body language, charades, and other forms of communicating when there is a language barrier. Food that does not have to be refrigerated. Rat poison. Water filtration. Ice. AIR CONDITIONING. The United States of America and its postal service (especially the flat rate box). Not getting bit by snakes while walking through the jungle alone. Children that do not cry at the site of me. Peace Corps and the people that give of themselves and their energy to spread peace through friendship (especially those that were sent to Suriname). New friends. Hugs. Patience. My education. Opportunities and the courage and confidence to take them. Just plain ole courage. Trust. Growing in big and unexpected ways. Friends of family that write me letters expressing their support and encouragement. The folks of Raleigh UMC and their prayers each and every week. Malobi and its people for protecting me and helping me, and for giving me their patience, their time, and my first place. 

Every year I am especially thankful for:

Laughter. Laughing. Laughter. My family and friends and the love they give so freely to me. I am especially thankful that seven months ago, they decided to let me be away from them for twenty-seven months and love me still. Not only that, but because they make sure that love is felt in South America every single day. My God and my parents for being proud of me simply because I am their child. Grace that never fails even when I seem to make it a habit. The fact that I feel loved no matter when I go. My life. My life is so so good. I am thankful to be reminded of that daily. 

Yesterday Peace Corps staff and volunteers were invited to celebrate Thanksgiving with the U.S. Ambassador to Suriname and his wife. It was so nice to have a big meal and celebrate with other  Americans. Not to mention the fact that it's pretty dang cool that I was able to celebrate at the Ambassador's house with Peace Corps friends. 

Thanksgiving. Please note the plate. I promise it's under the food. 

Erin, Allie, and Jonathan being thankful. 

Thankful. 

Tomorrow I return to site with a full belly and an extremely thankful heart. I will be back in December to welcome Christmas and ring in the New Year with my friends in Suriname. Thank you to everyone that reads my blog and supports my decision to be here. To those of you that love and encouragement me, I promise I am doing my best to spread love and peace through friendship. I give thanks for all of you everyday.

Camp GLOW

On November 2nd, thirty girls from three villages were welcomed by fourteen Saramaccan women and seventeen PCVs to a tourist camp on the Upper Suriname River to participate in the third Camp GLOW to be held on the river. Camp GLOW (Girls Leading Our World), is a leadership and empowerment camp for young girls, ages 12-up.

We hold Camp GLOW because girls living in the interior of Suriname receive little encouragement to continue their studies past the sixth grade. They are presented with minimal basic life skill development information, and face pressures to engage in sex at a young age. Camp GLOW encourages girls to continue their education, while also exposing them to the different opportunities they do have. The girls leave camp with a better understanding of ways to protect themselves and make healthy lifestyle choices. They are more empowered, and will hopefully return to their villages and share what they learned with others in their families and villages. 

Everyone that participated in Camp GLOW

In the midst of playing games and having an absolute blast, the girls attended lessons. They learned about the importance of doing their part to take care of the environment. They discussed gender roles and goal setting, which really challenged them to think about what their options are and what they want to be when they grow up. We talked about nutrition and self-esteem and the importance of taking care of our bodies. Most importantly, the girls were led through a discussion on HIV/AIDS. We talked about what HIV/AIDS is, how it's spread, and ways to protect ourselves against it.  Like all places in the world, HIV/AIDS is present. Like most places in the world, it's a very scary subject and it's not talked about enough. The last night of camp a lady living with HIV came and spoke to the girls. Hopefully through her testimony, the girls will not only gain a better understanding of how to protect themselves, but also realize that people with HIV/AIDS can still live a normal life. 

Girls listen to a lesson on HIV/AIDS

I served on the logistics team for camp and had an absolute blast. We were responsible for setting up for sessions and games. We served all the meals, and danced as we put food on everyone's plates. It was great. I was also a part of the green team, so I was also able to hang out with girls and play games with them. The week had "Peace Corps" written all over it. 

Helping girls on the green team tie dye our t-shirts

On November 6th we had to say goodbye to the girls. They 100%-absolutely-completely-no-doubt-about-it did not want to leave camp. These girls came from three different villages, and found new friends in each other. They most likely would not have met without this camp. It was so cool to see the new friendships they formed, how much they learned, and what they said they would take back and share with their own villages and families.

From a very young age, I have been in situations that require me to meet new people. The thought of Summer camp in America is so very common. Kids meet kids from other places all the time. I grew up going to camps, sometimes by choice and sometimes not. Until I was a part of Camp GLOW, I cannot honestly say I ever truly thought about the value in that. Just think- I was given a choice, and when my parents thought I didn't make the right one, they were there to see the value in something I did not quite understand. We all know it by now, but I am blessed and so very grateful. 

I will be in Paramaribo for a few more days. I go back to site on the 26th. December 1-5, we are holding the first Boy's Leadership Camp on the river. Three boys from my village are going and I am so excited. I went with a couple of other volunteers to tell the boys what they were going to have the opportunity to do, and as they tried to hold back their thirteen year old smiles through little giggles, I knew they could not wait. I think that a camp for boys in this culture is just as important as the ones that have been held for girls. I cannot wait to be a part of what they will learn and the lessons they will take away from those few days. 

All the photos in this post were taken by my fellow volunteer (and Mississippian) Ryan Dapremont. 

Five Month Update

I came back into the city on September 28, so I have been here about two weeks. I came in a little before EST (Early Service Training) to go to a birthday party for one of the ladies in SUR 16. She and her husband live in an Amerindian site, and she invited all of the volunteers to help her celebrate her 60th birthday. We all hung hammocks and slept outside in a pavilion. We danced, ate, and spent a lot of time hanging out in our hammocks. It was great to relax and be with friends while visiting other volunteers' site.

EST began on October 4. My group shared presentations with each other about our different sites, and met with our Program Managers to discuss how things are going at site and project work that we are interested in. The past week has consisted of sessions concerning how to write project proposals, as well as lots of information on how to present ideas to our communities and work with youth through sports. 

The past couple of days consisted of all of the volunteers in country playing soccer, relay races, and capture the flag to develop ways to work with the youth in our villages. My body is completely exhausted and sore. BUT I did score a goal in soccer and eliminate a player in dodgeball. These two things have never happened. Exciting stuff. 

I am starting to think a lot about what projects I am interested in and what I have to offer Malobi, as well as what I can help them accomplish. I am thinking a lot about HIV/AIDS prevention education and youth development work. 

The first week in November, some of the Saramaccan volunteers on the river are holding a girls leadership camp. We are going to put on a boys camp the first week in December. The camps will be for sixth grade students (ages 12-15) and will focus on leadership and empowerment. I truly believe that these camps will make a difference in their lives, and that they will be able to take what they've learned and pass it on to their friends that do not attend. Volunteers have already held a few camps for girls, but this will be the first time one has been held for the boys. I am thrilled for the kids that will be attending, and super excited to see how the camps operate. 

We will finish up EST in the next couple of days, and I will head back to site in about a week. 

A few days ago, one of my closest friends in Peace Corps went back to America. He decided that he had given all he could to his job here, and that it was time for him to go. While I supported his decision and knew it was the best decision for him, it was still really hard to watch him go. It rarely occurs to me that I have only known my friends here for about five months. It was hard to leave friends and family in America, but I think it was harder to watch one of my friends here leave. I know that my friends and family in America support me completely and will be waiting with open arms when I return (and I will be so ready for that), but they may never fully understand all that I am experiencing in Suriname. I need my new friends to stick with me for the next twenty-one months. I need friends in this country that understand what I am going through. I need friends in this country that can help me get rid of my latest bat infestation and that I can laugh with because we have to share our houses with bats. I would have to make a serious argument for myself to leave here. I am content and feel like I am where I belong for now, but Suriname is a tough country. I do not know how I would make it though the rest of my service without my friends here. 

On a more exciting note, before I left Malobi, I successfully carried my dishes to and from the river on my head with zero support from my hands. It's about a five minute walk each way. I was so excited, and I am so proud of myself. It's a good feeling when I do something to fit in a little more with my new community. 

I received lots of letters a couple of days ago. I cannot say "Thanks" enough. I truly believe that I am going to continue to be blown away and overwhelmed in the next couple of years by the love and support surrounding my life and my decision to serve in the Peace Corps. And I am completely okay with it. 

Kids

I wasn't as excited as I wanted to be to go back to site. I was not dreading it, I just felt very neutral and indifferent. After a long day of travel I finally reached Malobi. A lot of the ladies that live around me were away knocking rice. I walked over to meet them, and I was greeted with lots of hugs and yells of excitement for my return. That definitely helped my mood. That same night I was sitting at a neighbor's house with her and some of the kids I hang out with. I was showing them what I've always been told is, "how a horse eats a pumpkin." I was tickling their knees and they thought it was the funniest thing ever. They kept sticking their knees out to me and falling out laughing. Their laughter was infections, and I had to stop myself from crying at the preciousness of it all. I wish I could bottle their laughter up to listen to when days are hard. I have never spent this much time being around children and holding babies. It is strange that I am this attached to them.

My new best friends at site started school today. They are six. I am so upset that I am not there to see them get on the boat or to take a picture of them in their new school uniforms. I wanted to be there when they got home from school with popcorn and juice for them. I am overwhelmed with excitement for these children as they begin their education.

I arrived in the city this past Wednesday after only spending about a week at site. I will be here until the middle of October for Early Service Training. I am really excited to be in the city with all of the other volunteers.

On my way in to the city, I was in Atjoni, waiting for a bus to take me to the city. This little girl was sitting beside me, and insisted on braiding my hair. Aaah the things that happen in my life these days. How many times have you been sitting anywhere and a child that you do not know asked to braid your hair? Hilarious.

There were also eighteen people in my van to the city, but that's another story. I am looking forward to enjoying my time in the city with fast food, and being more excited to return to Malobi in mid-October.